How to Become a Less Overbearing Parent

 No parent is perfect, and most of the mistakes that parents make start off with well-intentioned parenting approaches. However, they don’t always come off that way, and that can be a problem in many instances. When you’re trying to push your child in the right direction and set them up for life, you might occasionally cross the boundary into being a little too overbearing.

If that’s something that you’ve started to notice in yourself and something that you want to reduce going forward, you’re in the right place. We're going to talk today about some of the things you can do to make yourself a far less overbearing parent going forward. So read on and find out more.

Don’t Judge Their Early Friendships

Lots of parents understandably worry about things like who their kids are spending time with and who they’re friends with. But although you can try to steer them in the right direction and, of course, teach them right from wrong, you can’t really decide who they spend their time with. If they feel as if you’re judging their friendships and decisions, they’re not going to like that and it’ll come across as you being overbearing and overstepping the mark, even when they’re still quite young.

Don’t Allow Your Feedback to be Solely Negative

When you give feedback to your kids about anything at all, you should try to make sure that the feedback is never solely negative. You don’t want it to seem like you’re constantly criticizing your child or picking faults, even if that was never your intention in the first place. It’s just as important to highlight the positives and to praise them for the things that they’re doing well. That balance will make them feel much more responsible when you are giving them constructive feedback.

Always Be There for Them Emotionally

Emotional support is very important and it’s one of your most important tasks as a parent. You need to be there for them emotionally and able to offer the right kind of support if you’re going to be the best parent you can be. This is something that parents often ignore when they’re focused on bringing up their children the right way and encouraging them to be successful academically. All of those things are important but it’s also important to understand that they can’t replace emotional support.

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Guide Them Rather Than Pushing Them in Particular Directions

When you’re looking to help your child take the right path in life, it’s important to remember that you can’t and shouldn’t control their decision-making. That’s something that only they can do, especially as they start to get older. And if you try to push them in a particular direction that they don’t want to go in, they’ll only end up rebelling against you anyway. Pressure and pushing don’t work. You can do your best to teach them well and guide them, but their independence matters too.

Support Rather Than Enforce When it Comes to Schoolwork

If you’re the kind of parent that can be a little overbearing when it comes to schoolwork and want your child to succeed academically, you should try to tread carefully. Your good intentions might actually lead to your child feeling pressured and anxious about their schoolwork, and that’s not what’s going to help them achieve more. If they’re struggling in a particular subject area, it’s probably a good idea to help them with some extra work and be there to support them. You can find extra exercises at This is much better than enforcing a particular routine on them.

Show an Interest in Their Interests

Taking an interest in the things that they’re interested in is something that all parents should try to do. It’s a good way of showing that you’re respectful of their individuality and their personal interests. And it also shows the kind of support that all parents should try to offer their kids. Some overbearing parents try to shape their kid's hobbies and interests, but it’s much better for them to find those personal interests in their own way and in their own time.

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Let Them Experience Failure

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to shield and protect your kids, but it’s something that can also be damaging in the long term. Sometimes, you need to allow your kids to experience failure and what it’s like to not succeed. That’s just as important for building character and growing into a well-rounded adult as being successful as a child. No one is perfect and it’s important for them to learn the lessons that failure is okay and it’s something that can be learned from. So don’t shield them from those experiences.

Handle Problems Together

When your child has problems that they don’t feel able to deal with alone, it’s important to be there for them and to help them. It often helps to allow them to come to you with these problems, and you sometimes have to give them a little time before they feel comfortable doing that. When they do, it’ll be their decision and you can set about working on their problems together and helping them.

Learn to Gradually Relax Boundaries

As your child gets older, you’ll need to learn how important it is to gradually relax boundaries and change things up a little. The boundaries that were suitable and relevant when they were 8 won’t be the same when they’re 12. That might not seem like a big leap in years, but it is for a developing and growing child. So it’s important that you incorporate that flexibility into your approach to parenting.

Most parents aren’t trying to be overbearing, but the intention matters less than the outcome when it comes to these kinds of things. If your child feels pressured and managed, they’ll end up becoming anxious and unhappy, and that’s not what anyone wants for their child. So take a more relaxed approach and see how it benefits them and you.

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